a view from down under: domestic violence in Melbourne

Great article posted a couple of days ago on the Herald Sun, a Melbourne publication in Australia. It is one of the first Australian articles I came across and it was very interesting.

If you don’t have to time to fully check it out, here are, in my opinion, two of the most important parts:

“One in seven men said they had been emotionally abused by a partner, as compared to one in four women.”


“Lone Fathers Association of Australia president Barry Williams told Leader that the overwhelming focus on men solely as perpetrators had led to a general suspicion and lack of sympathy for male victims.”

First of all: one in seven men. Not only is it a big number but it is no reflection of the actual number of men who reportedly are victims of domestic abuse. Many believe that men victims of domestic abuse should not be a priority in social issues due to the low amount of victims. What this article points out, which I agree with, is that the statistics of male victims is not a true reflection of the number of actual victims. Which leads to…

my second point: men are not encouraged enough to seek help when they are abused. And for multiple reasons: stereotypes that men are strong and should “take it like a man”, that women can’t hurt them that bad, that men shouldn’t complain and be emotional because it will make them “girly”, or that people would think that they indeed must be the perpetrator or have been violent first. All these stereotypes have to stop.

The article also points out the lack of sympathy for male victims. Men victims of abuse should not be put in the unjustified “men category -which contains a lot of perpetrators (enemies)”, but in the “men victims of abuse -which contains victims, seeking help”.

How do you feel about the debate? Isn’t it time to change?


article on mintpress news: “Woman as Agressor: the unspoken truth of domestic violence” by Edward rhymes

This article was enlightening. The author kept a great balance between agreeing that more women are victims of domestic violence, but if we want to truly end the debate of domestic abuse, we have to admit that they can also at times be the perpetrators.

Edward Rhymes started his article by reminding the number of women victims not only of domestic violence but also rape and other forms of abuse. He then expressed that, that being said, there also are men victims of women’s abuse.

A very important point he made was when he quoted Jan Brown, executive director and founder of the Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men, who expressed that “domestic violence is not about size, gender, or strength. It’s about abuse, control, and power, and getting out of dangerous situations and getting help, whether you are a woman being abused, or a man.” Domestic violence os not only about leaving scars on one’s body, but also affecting them mentally and emotionally.

He also pointed out that few men did speack up about their issues, and that sadly not many were heard. He said that “some researchers estimate that about 20 percent of men who call law enforcement to report an abusive spouse or partner, are, in turn, arrested for domestic abuse”.

He also writes late in the article: “this writer agrees: We need to talk to our boys and men about having respect for their partners in their relationships. Yet, that’s only part of the problem. Our girls and young ladies need to be taught what appropriate behavior is and what non-violent conflict resolution looks like,” which resumes the article beautifully.

Men not only as abusers, but also as victims.

Men Victims of Domestic Violence in NSW

Reports from the NSW Bureau of Crime Statistics and Research show that from July 2012 to June 2013, there have been 2568 reported cases of domestic assaults were men are the victims. Why is it not more spoken of and written about?

This social media campaign is designed the increase awareness about those cases and give men who are physically and emotionally abused a platform to express themselves. The preconcieved idea that men cannot be their partner’s victims have to change.


Speack Up! If you are a victim or know someone who is suffering in silence, here is your chance to share.