violence on men

Where to turn to?

So in many of my posts I write that men should have more platforms to express themselves, seek help and get out of their struggles. Now I wouldn’t and probably shouldn’t expect victims of domestic abuse to want to write a little comment here on how they feel. So let me combine a few centres, hotlines or help groups where victims can actually turn to and get the help they need.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline in Austin, Texas, just wrote an article about men as victims, and linked to these addresses:

Other outlets men victims can use include:

The Mayo Clinic based in Rochester, Minnesota, has a great domestic violence against men section.

The detailed and targeted 1 in 6 foundation in California has a support line and many information on the matter.

In California, the Help4Guys foundation encourages donations to help men victims of abuse.

The Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women works with the USA and Canada and can be reached on 1-888-743-5754.

In Canada, the Family of Men Support Society raises funds to help put male victims back on their feet.

The Men’s Advice Line in the UK offers services by email or telephone at 0808 8010327.

Again in the UK, the ManKindInitiative has a national helpline on 01823 334244.

The Dyn Project acts in Wales as a help for men domestic of abuse, and answer to 0808 801 0321.

In Australia, the Men’s Rights Agency is a non-for-profit organisation that works towards helping men.

MensLine Australia offers support to victims all around Australia and can be reached on 1300789978.

The One In Three campaign in NSW, which I have mentioned previously, has a great list of services and resources that I recommend checking it out.

If you know any other organisations or services, please let me know about them. If you have had any experiences that you would like to share, do consider this blog as another platform where you would be listened.

What is your opinion?

My opinion is pretty clear. I believe that, like women victims, men victims of domestic abuse should be cared for, listened to and taken seriously.

In addition, I feel like the society we are in today leaves little room for men to express their feelings. What problem does this lead to? They cannot reach for help.

Something is so far missing from this blog, and I have taken too long to address it: households were both partners are victims of each other’s abuse. If a man is victim from his partner’s physical, mental or emotional maltreatment and cannot seek help, there is a greater potential for him eventually fighting back. The result of this situation is a violent vicious circle where both members are perpetrators and victims. Allowing men to take out built up feelings can in that way prevent a violent relationship.

This latest addition, as well as other arguments explained in previous blog posts, rounds up all the reasons I believe men victims should be listened to.

Now, it is your turn: What do you think? Why do you believe men should be looked after when being abused by their partner? Do you agree or disagree with my reasons?

a view on women offenders

I came across a very useful website: http://www.avoiceformen.com/

A great article I found was ‘The Cycle of the Female Abuser’ by Kimberley Taylor.

She explains that most women offenders feel remorseless after being physically or emotionally abusive to their partner.

Perhaps it is because society is less condemning and more dismissive of a woman who is abusive, resulting in less societal awareness and consequently more room for personal denial. It is also possible that the male is even less aware that they are being abused and may even take more responsibility due to the same lack of societal awareness. In short, the dynamic in the relationship may allow for this denial.

In a recent recent study noted (Gelles 2006), about fifty percent of men and women thought it was okay for a woman to hit a man. With these global attitudes, it is no wonder some women feel justified in slapping their partners. Some even said they knew they could not do too much damage because of their size; they therefore minimised their actions and denied it was abuse at all.

Is society giving women excuses for being violent?

On the same website was a video of Kelly Brook saying that she had punched in the face two of her ex-partners, after which she explained that they wouldn’t have felt much since they were much bigger than her.

Does this make it ‘okay’ to be violent to a man? Shouldn’t any form of violence be treated equally?

Kelly Brook’s interview.